New Year, New World Order

Happy New Year fellow toddlers! I apologize for the delay in my weekly communique...that dumb female slave of mine let the camera battery run down and I couldn't upload my pictures yesterday! Ugh that female slave is so worthless! I am very optomistic about the coming year, I think it will be a real turning point for our efforts in total world domination. Which will be nice, because if I have to be nice to this female slave much longer I think I am gonna crack!

This is one of the torture devices the adult slaves use on me..they call them "shoes". I am sure some of you toddlers are also familiar with them, I HATE THEM! Here I am testing the material to see if there is an easy way to destroy them...if I find any weakness in the construction of these objects I will let you know!

Where is that pepperoni pizza I ordered? Thirty minute guarantee my butt!

Male slave, I don't care if you two losers did tell me I couldn't order a pizza...I am a General and will do what I want! The vittles prepared for my supper today disgust me...what would you have me do...starve??

Nothing like a cool and refreshing drink after defying the adult slaves with my pepperoni pizza! I always make sure I have two beverages available to me....both water and milk. If the female slave neglects to put out one of my cups....full fuss mode ensues!

This is an easy and surefire way to drive your adult slaves insane...playing with these delightful things called "electrical cords". I don't actually play with them as I know they can be quite dangerous, but I kind of touch and fondle them and watch to make sure the slaves are paying attention....it drives them CRAZY! You must try it!

One of the gifts I received for being fabulous last week was this device that they call a "Learning Table". Now we all know that I don't need to learn anything because I am the general and already know everything due to the large size of my brain, but it's possible I could modify this device to code messages to send out to my colonels.......

Female slave, how many times do I have to tell you I am not to be disturbed in my laboratory?

Ok stupid beagle, Let me show you this ninja move for keeping the large male slave under control......

You two are impossible! All I asked you to do was keep the female slave occupied while I was testing out my new coding device and of course you failed miserably at the task! I am just not sure that you are of any use to me in the movement!

As you can see fellow toddlers, I am quite busy finding new and inventive ways for us to communicate, drive our slaves nuts, etc. I am sure I will have more to report next week...and I am pleased to announce that I have also scheduled a meeting with my overall second in command, Colonel Pickle at his home base in two weeks. Also in attendance will be the clever female spy Smiley Riley. I am sure that I will have much to report after this meeting!

Until next week fellow toddlers!